Tag: sevendwarves

Substitute Thieves

“…And there she is!” Baby bear threw the covers back triumphantly. He jumped back as flames shot past his left ear, singeing the ends of his fur. There was a dragon in the bed.

The dragon stopped breathing fire and sat up. “Sorry about that,” he said, looking embarrassed. “You surprised me.”

“But who are you?” Baby bear narrowed his eyes. “And where is Goldilocks? Did you eat her?”

The dragon looked offended. “Of course not. She isn’t at all royal. I only eat princesses. Unless they get rescued, of course. Unfortunately, they always do. Mostly I just eat peanut butter sandwiches.” The dragon looked at the taller bears. “Who made the porridge? It was excellent. The serving in the little bowl was just right. Do you make granola? I would buy it by the barrel!”

“I hadn’t thought of granola,” Papa bear said. “Goldilocks likes porridge so much that I never make anything else.”

“I like granola too,” Mama bear said. “Maybe we could make some after the dragon leaves.”

“I’ll give you my number. Call me if you need a taste tester,” the dragon said, pulling a business card from his pocket and handing it to Papa bear.

“Guys, stop talking about granola. We need to find out what happened to Goldilocks!” Baby bear stomped his feet.

“Oh. Right.” The dragon got up and stretched. “Goldilocks ate some really old pease porridge and got sick. So, she called in some substitutes. She’ll be gone all week.”

Mama bear started making the bed. “Oh, the poor child. She never could resist good porridge. How old was it?”

“Nine days old. Can you believe it? I’m not sure how it lasted that long without being eaten.” The dragon smiled a wide, toothy smile. “Well, it was nice to meet you all, but I have an appointment with a princess.”

“Bye!” Mama and Papa bears waved happily at the departing dragon as he leaped from the window and flew away.

“Wasn’t he nice?” Mama bear said. “I wonder who will come tomorrow?”

“Let’s make some granola. Do you think we should add coconut?” Papa bear rubbed his paws together as he followed Mama bear down the stairs. “This will be fun.”

Baby bear rolled his eyes and followed them downstairs. “Let’s fix my chair first, or it will be broken tomorrow when the substitute comes, and then what will they do?”

The next morning, after the usual walk and subsequent discovery of missing granola and broken furniture, Baby bear threw the covers on his bed back a little more cautiously than usual. “…And there…is a goat?”

The goat stood up on the bed and tossed back his horns. “That’s right, it is I, the littlest billy goat Gruff!”

“Nice to meet you,” Mama bear said. “But please don’t stand on the furniture.”

“Sorry about that,” the goat said, hopping off the bed. “I guess I was more nervous than I thought. Do you have any trolls you need me to toss around?”

“Nope,” Papa bear said. “But we have a barrel of granola in the kitchen.”

“I wouldn’t mind more. The granola in the littlest bowl was just right. It would only be better if I had an apple to eat with it.”

Baby bear pointed out the window. “That’s an apple tree right there. Have as many apples as you’d like.”

“Really? I’ll take a few with me, then. I’m meeting my brothers at a bridge on the other side of the valley. The grass is greener there, you know.” The goat jumped from the window into the tree and stuffed his pockets full of apples before jumping down and trit-trotting away.

The rest of the week was just as strange. There was a princess who pricked her finger on a fork and fell asleep at the table. She didn’t wake up until they put a pea under the chair cushion. She left complaining about bruises.

Then there were the seven grumpy little men who were crowded on the little bed when the bears got home. They were still hungry after splitting the three bowls of granola. “We were promised breakfast, and we won’t leave until we get some so bring it right here,” one of them said. When they finally left, Baby bear’s bed was full of crumbs.

On Friday, there was no one in the bed, but there was a mermaid in the bathtub. “I ran out of magic potion,” she told them. “Do you have any?” The bears did not have any magic potion, but the witch next door had some so the mermaid was able to leave. “I’m sorry I didn’t get a chance to break the chair or sleep in your bed,” she told Baby bear.

“That’s okay,” Baby bear said. “Some days are like that.”

On Monday, Baby bear threw the covers back. “…And there she is! Hey, it really is her.” Goldilocks was back.

“It’s me,” she said. “But where was the porridge? I don’t really like granola, you know.”

“Sorry,” Papa bear said. “We made more than expected. But, I know someone who might like it. We’ll be back to porridge tomorrow.”

“Good. Well, time to go,” Goldilocks said. She jumped out the window and ran away.

“It was fun meeting new people, but it’s nice to have her back,” Mama bear said fondly as she made the bed.

“I’ll go call the dragon about the barrel of granola,” Papa bear said, heading towards the stairs.

Baby bear hurried after him. “Wait, you need to fix my chair first!”

And they lived happily every day after.

Dragon in Little Bear's bed.

The Gingerbread Tower

Once upon a time, the three bears sat down to eat breakfast.  Unfortunately, their porridge was too hot.  So, they went for a walk in the woods while they waited for it to cool.  While they were walking, they wandered into an area of the woods that they’d never visited before.

They paused as they heard voices up ahead.  Peering through some conveniently placed bushes, they saw a strange sight.  A woman dressed all in black was standing at the foot of a gingerbread tower.

“Rapunzel, I said to let down your hair.  I forgot something, and I’m going to be late.”  The woman stomped her foot.

A window opened at the top of the tower and a younger woman looked out.  “What did you forget? I’ll toss it down to you.”

The woman in black stomped her foot again.  “Just let down your hair.  I don’t have time to describe it to you.”

The woman at the window tossed out a very, very long, blond braid.  The woman in black used it to climb the tower.  She climbed back down a few minutes later and pointed a stick at a pumpkin in the garden next to the tower.

The pumpkin turned into a carriage.  With a few more flicks of her wand, some mice nibbling at the tower became horses.  The bears, hidden in the bushes, shuddered.  They were glad they’d decided to remain hidden.  It could have been them turned into horses!

The witch, for what else could she be, hitched the horses to the carriage and rode away.  The bears looked at each other.

“If she’s not home, it might be safe to look a little closer,” Mama bear said.

“The gingerbread smells heavenly,” Papa bear said.

“Did you forget what happened to the mice?” Baby bear said.  “They were turned into horses.  We might be turned into pigs.  Then we’ll be eaten!”

“Nonsense,” Mama bear said.  “With all this gingerbread, who would want bacon?”

Papa bear shook his head.

And so, with Baby bear trailing behind them and looking around suspiciously, they approached the tower.  Because they hadn’t eaten breakfast yet, they were all quite hungry.  Soon there was a large hole eaten from the side of the tower.

“Oops,” Mama bear said. “I just meant to taste it to see if I could bake something like it at home.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Papa bear said.  “They needed a door anyway.  Now they won’t have to climb out the window.”

“I could go in and bake them a door to put in the hole,” Mama bear said. “I have a nice brownie recipe.”

“That’s a terrible idea,” Baby bear whispered loudly.  “We should run away now!”

But they went inside anyway, and Baby bear followed them in.  Inside, seven very short men were busily working in a kitchen that filled the base of the tower.  One of the men looked up and scowled.

“It looks like we need a five by six patch.”

“Five by six?” The man in glasses next to him put down his mixing bowl and took out a notepad and pencil. He wrote on the pad and then tore the page out and handed it to the bears.

Papa bear took the page.  “Is this a bill?”

The man in glasses nodded. “We charge by the square foot.”

“I thought I could bake you a door,” Mama bear said.  “I make great brownies.”

“Brownies are terrible construction material.  Too soft,” the scowling man said.  “And we don’t need a door.”

“But the witch…” Mama bear began.

“She’s just overly efficient,” said a voice behind them.

The bears whirled around.  The blond woman was behind them.  Baby bear squeezed himself between his parents and tried to wish himself invisible.

“Weren’t you trapped in the tower?” Papa bear asked nervously.

“No, I just spin in there.  My hair grows unnaturally fast, so I spin it and braid it into ropes.  The witch is my product tester.  She insists on using my hair ropes to enter and leave so that product testing is built into her day.  If she was really in a hurry, she’d ride her broom.”

“So if you wanted to leave…” Mama bear began.

“There is a door on the other side of the tower.”  Rapunzel yawned.  “Wow.  Spinning sure makes me sleepy.  One of these days, I’m going to fall asleep at the wheel and prick my finger on the spindle.”

Papa bear pulled out his wallet and paid, and the bears went home.  Inside their house, they found that the porridge was eaten, a chair was broken, and a little girl was asleep in Baby bear’s bed.  Baby bear woke up the girl.

She looked at her watch and leaped out of bed.  “You’re late!” she threw on a red cloak and picked up a basket that was waiting by the bed.  “I’m going to be late getting these goodies to grandma’s house.”

“Just don’t stop to talk to strangers this time,” Baby bear said.

The little girl made a face at him, then jumped out the window and ran away.  The bears looked at each other.

“That was different,” Papa bear said.  “But it’s fun to try new things.”

“It was fun,” Mama bear said.  “We should go back to the tower again.  I want to taste a window.  Just to see if I could make one at home, of course.”

Baby bear sighed.  “That was stressful and exhausting.  I need a nap.” And hew went upstairs and went to bed.

“Should we have told him about the magic beans?” Mama bear asked.  “Maybe he needs a bit of warning.”

“I’m sure he’ll be fine,” Papa bear said.  “Just toss them out the window.  Let’s see if they grow.”

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